“You’re not old- you’re still just a baby!” It’s comforting to hear that I guess, but the people telling me I’m still a baby are usually over 70. That’s not that comforting.
I’m 53 now, and for the first time in my life, I’m starting to wonder if I’m old. Ok maybe it’s not the first time (I did write this blog post a few years ago), but it’s one of the first times.
People would often guess my age to be about 35. That stopped a few years ago.
I felt physically better than ever until about 2 years ago.
My memory was sharp as the razor that cuts my beard until recently.
Speaking of that beard, it turned gray last year and I’m not at all happy about it (see the previous line about “not looking 35 anymore”)
The past month or so, I’ve been attacked by some of the same thoughts my friend Troy is currently dealing with (see his post here).
My mind has been focusing on questions like:
Are you past your prime?
How close to death are you?
Are you (body and mind) going straight downhill from here?
What do you have to show for your life?
What else can you accomplish before you head to the exits?
Do you have the energy to do it?
Hey old dog, can you still learn new tricks?
All of these questions are bothersome and irritating. I’d like also to say they’re unhelpful and unhealthy, but I’m honestly not sure if that’s true. There might be some value in them as far as self reflection and gearing up for what’s next. I’m not sure.
But after taking a look back at my life over the past several months, I noticed that the appearance of these thoughts directly correlates with the weakening of my self care routine.
I’m not saying I could have prevented this mini, mental crisis or that I’ve found the magical answers to the questions of aging, but I think it would have helped me to be and feel the best I can, and to deal with thoughts better as they arise.
So here, is my as yet untested (after all I am only 53) recipe for growing old without feeling old. In no certain order:
- Do yoga everyday
- Eat a clean diet
- Get proper sleep
- Get regular exercise
- Keep up with what’s new in the world and engage with it (Art, technology,..)
- Stretch your body, stretch your mind, stretch your spirit (interpret both literally and figuratively)
- Keep stress in check!!
- Meditate
- Make some younger friends
- Have a purpose or goal
- Stay connected to people and community
And if you’re looking for something more credible, here’s the opinion of some random but wise 70 year-old I found on Medium. Read it- it’s really good!
I know a guy who began running at age 52. He’s now deep into his 60’s, still works a full time job and travels the world to run marathons. He sometimes runs several in a month! He is proof that a strong mentality can lead to deep vitality. (Running is as much mental as it is physical)
I do think a lot of aging is mental, although clearly a lot of it is not. But there are plenty of elders we can learn from, leading to a deeply satisfying middle and later life. Here are a few “old people” who still seem to be living large, contributing, and doing cool stuff (I did all my research on Wikipedia and YouTube- scoff if you want to).
- Joe Biden – US President – 80 years old
- Jeannie Rice– Marathon Runner-71 years old
- Lorne Michaels– TV Producer- 78 years old
- Tao Porchon Lynch– Yoga Instructor 96- years old
- Steve Martin- Actor/Comedian- 77 years old
- Tom Hanks– Actor- 66 years old
- Judy Woodruff– News Anchor/Journalist- 76 years old
- Tom Brady– NFL Quarterback- 105 in football years, 45 in actual years
- The cast of 80 for Brady– stars multiple senior women, as does the soundtrack
And these are just a few of the more famous people, not to mention all those still killing it in life as “regular Joes”.
When nature does catch up to me and my time comes, I hope to be spiritually and emotionally together enough to accept my fate with gratitude, in the same way my daughter did when she realized she was growing into a new phase of amusement park rides.
Until then, may we all ride the wave until we crash onto the beach, belly first and smiling.
Follow and subscribe to Five O’Clock Shadow for more stories and pieces including the RebEarth series, Old Man Rants and Music. New categories are in the works. Each Friday, I’ll post to a new piece to Wise & Shine so be sure to subscribe there as well. For my musical life, visit www.toddfulginiti.com
So true
LikeLiked by 1 person
💪🏻💪🏻
LikeLike
What a post, Todd! I love all of this — good advice, humor and a gentle nudge to ‘get it’…whatever IT is for each of us. And…this? About Tom Brady? “105 in football years, 45 in actual years”. Hilarious and true, I say! 😉😎😉
LikeLiked by 3 people
Thanks Victoria! 😁😎 I really appreciate the nice comments!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hi Todd.
Always be a newbie at something. Suck at something then get better at it
In my forensic engineering practice there are a few young but more 60 and above. Many in their 80s and a few in their 90s
I’m relatively a newbie there.
I’ll tell you my worrisome aging story at our upcoming jam
LikeLiked by 2 people
Wow! Interesting about the forensic engineering ages and great tip about being a newbie. Thanks Bob!
LikeLike
I see old people who are younger than me (71). Esther and I are hanging out at a ski lodge in Blue Mountain where our son and his sons are skiing. No, we’re not. One of those youthful things I’ve set aside. Actually I skied a few dozen times on rented equipment from 1968 to 1972.
Anyway after reading your blog today I asked some old man if he ever owned wooden skis and ski boots with laces.
He laughed and said, “Nah. They were obsolete by the time I started.”.
So he looked old, but was significantly younger.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’ve tried skiing a few times- but don’t think I would have if I had to use wood and laces- I had my hands more than full with the modern stuff, which I assume is easier to use.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great Post Todd, and I really like your list of activities and attitudes to stay young.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks Brenda! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good suggestions of things to do to stay/feel young. I’ve read that the last suggestion, a sense of community, is possibly the most important of all.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks Jay! Years ago I read a Time magazine article which interviewed people who lived past 100 and I think every single one of them stressed the need for community.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Two comments (from someone about to turn 77): (1) when I think of “old people” they are, and will always be, 10 years older than me. That way, I’ll never really get old. (2) I think it was John Lennon who said “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”. His message has a kind of Carpe diem flavor to it. I wrote a brief poem once reflecting on my life after my wife’s death: ”
We can spend today thinking of what might have been,
Or we can spend today wondering what will be,
Or we can realize that the only way to win,
Is to spend today like it’s eternity.”
LikeLiked by 2 people
I love both comments and the poem! Great advice too. Thanks for sharing that Uncle Norm! 💙
LikeLike
I’m so with you on all of these. And #9 reminds me of my grandpa. He hated hanging out with people his age (the old people). And it really did seem to keep him young for longer. 😀
As a side note, what are your thoughts about Medium? I’ve dabbled in it, as well as Substack, as they seem more accessible to non-bloggers (people who just follow you). Of the two, I think Medium has it going on, and I like the way it automatically adds voice-over (Substack you have to do some finagling). Any opinions on either/or? Ever consider switching?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Funny you ask about Medium- I don’t know that much about it but I’m constantly considering switching and even more so lately. One of the Wise & Shine writers really likes it and does well there. I like how it seems easier to make money, a little bit at least. The voice over thing sounds good too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I agree to all of that. The only reason I haven’t switched is the community I’m engaged with here. I post things there too (occasionally), but while people seem to be just as engaged and warm, they aren’t people I know. The voice over thing is huge though. And it’s really well done. Kind of crazy.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sounds like I need to check out that voiceover thing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great post, Todd! I love your list of self-care routines and since I’m also 53, they were a great reminder. And your list of people older (mostly) than us doing great things helped give me some great perspective. Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for reading Wynne!
53- a good place to be 🙂
LikeLike