It’s time for another rant already! This time it’s about football. After starting out this season as the worst 4-0 team in recent memory, the Philadelphia Eagles have lost two games in a row and look like total garbage. But that’s not the main reason I’m annoyed. My main problem is that I’m tired of announcers saying senseless stuff on TV.

You want examples? Here you go…

Some of these are very Eagle-centric, hopefully fans of other teams don’t suffer from these same issues too. Have you ever heard these gems?

Barrett’s Baby Talk

Eagles post game analyst Barrett Brooks, on CSN Philly, uses the goofiest and most annoying phrase I’ve ever heard in my life. When agreeing with someone else on the panel, he says “ah-dah-dah”.  What the hell?! It sounds idiotic! He’s been doing it for several years now and honestly, unless there is some special reason for it that I’m unaware of, I think he should be told to stop saying it or lose his job. He doesn’t add much to the panel anyway.

Consonants Matter

Dave Zangaro, also of CSN sports in Philly, is an Eagles beat writer, but he also makes TV appearances and does an Eagles podcast with my favorite Philly sportswriter, Rueben Frank. Unfortunately, Dave believes in speaking without having his tongue make contact with his teeth or the roof of his mouth, so listening to him speak can be very irritating.

To illustrate, let’s play a game called “What The Hell Is Zangaro Saying?”. Listen to the audio clips and make your guess- answers are at the bottom of this post.

Defeat Elite!

Can we find another word to describe someone who is at the top of their game, besides elite? I’m just sick of hearing it!!

Optionality

I don’t remember who it was, but recently I’ve heard a couple people using the word “optionality”…. That means that you have the ability to choose from options-in other words, it’s optional!

Optional is a very nice and effective word that doesn’t need reinvented into something as pointless as “optionality”. Come on man! If you want to sound impressive, don’t invent new words, just make effective use of the ones we already have!

Identifying Identity

As the Eagles have been struggling, several reporters are saying that the team has not found the identity of who they are. 

What?!

Isn’t it sufficient to just say they haven’t found their identity? Saying they haven’t found the identity of who they are is like taking a picture of someone who is taking a picture of someone who is taking a picture of someone.  Plus it sounds stupid!

I think if you’re going to be on TV, you should demonstrate command of the English language, and many of these “ professional media people” simply do not. BOOOOOOOO!

(Here are the answers to “What The Hell Is Zangaro Saying?” : alright; I don’t know, Cooper DeJean, 2024)

And now, excuse me while I run some kids off my lawn.

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